This is probably going to be brief, because I don’t think there’s a whole lot I can say about this game. It’s kind of like that, despite being a rather high-profile title with a lot of work put into the visuals. That’s the problem, this game is all foreplay.

First, the obvious. Samuel L. “Motherfucking” Jackson starts the festivities with aplomb, hamming it up and cursing almost immediately to let you know what to expect. But despite the box’s claim and the advertising, he’s not Afro Samurai. This is a bit confusing, what with most of the early voiceover being narration instead of spoken. If you haven’t followed the… what the hell is it? An anime? A movie? I have no Samuel L. “Motherfucking” clue… then the story seems to drop you right into it expecting you to know what’s going on.

Fortunately it starts to drop in the details early, and it’s actually quite an interesting story. The game does a decent job of keeping the narrative alive as the action continues, which is typically difficult in the gaming medium. The big bad questions your motives as you take out hallways full of ninjas and buck naked women (for whatever goddamn reason), your Samuel L. “Motherfucking” sidekick throws in taunts and observations.

Thematically, the game rocks. Everything works together to set up this weird little world you’ll be playing in. The music, “inspired” by the RZA, is a charming blend of old Japanese themes and hip-hop. Which I usually can’t fucking stand, so it probably means something that I found myself enjoying the rhythm. It all just suits a package that seems to be crammed with the fresh corpses of The Matrix, Crouching Tiger, and the rap operas that pull off what 50 Cent accidentally make a caricature of.

Another strength, as noted before, are the visuals. Afro Samurai sports a very unique blend of cel-shading and a cross-hatched art style that really work, though the cross-hatching looks a bit assy when the game goes in for those dramatic close-ups. It’s a beauty to see in motion, with top notch animation, and the level designers really earned their paycheck. The environments you slice your way through are well-paved, visually interesting works of art. A little exploration would have been nice, but unfortunately it’s largely a linear affair.

Which is the problem. When I heard complaints that the combat system was pretty monotonous, I figured it wouldn’t be too much of a problem. After all, I’m the dipshit who can still pick up a new Dynasty Warriors game and love the hell out of it as if it were the first time. I figured something with an actual combo system would be pretty damn sweet by comparison.

Chop up baddies to clear invisible barrier, move down a hall, repeat. See, Dynasty Warriors at least had sprawling maps with lots of problems for you to take on as you saw fit. Afro Samurai, after all the flashy blood and awesome level design, is a pretty typical Samuel L. “Motherfucking” action game. Sure, sometimes you hit switches, run across narrow beams, and hop from platform to platform. But even that’s getting older than the term “as it were” in the assy annals of New Games Journalism. The game just isn’t much fun after the first couple of levels.

I mean fuck, guys, Prince of Persia just taught us a few months ago: Wall-running followed by sliding down a cliff is the same exact goddamn thing as sliding down a cliff followed by wall-running.

It would be a bit more forgivable if the combat system were anything other than average. It’s good for what it does, but no better than anything you’ve played in recent memory. Medium slash, heavy slash, kick, block, and the gaming anthem of the special mode shoulder button. I’m too lazy and shitheaded to really describe it in much more detail than that, because if you’re that interested you can go play it yourself.

But unless you’re starved for a hack and slash game, or you’re a fan of whatever the fuck it was Afro Samurai started as, I can’t say I recommend it until the price comes down.